Tuesday, September 30, 2014


The spacious room was dimly lit in orange lights, with bodies lying around everywhere.  Adult bodies as well as babies. Well, they're not dead, just sleeping. Almost everyone was asleep except the two of us, whispering in the middle of the room, sharing thoughts and emotions like normal girls do. (Hmm.. this is one of the reasons why i don't mind babysitting. most often than not, its not just the babies that go to sleep, their babysitters too! leaving the room all to ourselves. *mischievious grin* Note: you just have to strategise so that all babies sleep at the same time. (Babysitters would follow suit.)

As i listened to k'Thuaibah sharing her memories bersama arwah k'Ziq, from how k'Ziq has always been a person full of spirit dalam usaha mentarbiyyah diri, from how she has always wanted to have someone with the name 'Bilal' in her family.. to how, when she died in the bus accident together with her arwah zauj, it was revealed that the child she was carrying was intended to be named 'Bilal'.. ya Allah.. truly.. manusia memang hanya sekadar boleh merancang, hanya Allah yang menetapkan.

As much as the death of k'Ziq, her husband, her unborn child, in short her whole family, has brought important tazkirah to us all, how much would the death of ourselves and our families bring to everyone? And, what 'kind' of tazkirah would we bring? Would it merely be a tazkirah that "innalillah, everybody will die one day"? Or would it be more than that? Would it simply be a tazkirah of how they have loved and missed our akhlak, or would it include awakening their sleeping souls and forcing their slump bodies to take actions. Would people reflect on us for the 'right' reasons? Would their reflections ever become the never ending benefits for us in our graves?

Husbands, Parents, Siblings, Children, close Friends and Relatives may be the people we hold dear to our hearts now. We might not hesitate to even die for them. It's not seldom to read newspapers reporting a mother sacrificing her life for her child when they were being attack, or a father jumping into the river to save his drowning child, with the child coming out alive but never did he. Yet, these exact people may unfortunately be our most hated enemies later on in akhirah. If we are not careful now.

Cheating, Back biting, Back stabbing, Loss of trust, have always been the things that hurt relationships, leading to never ending bickering, fights and arguments and sometimes physical harm. When those things happen in akhirah, we couldn't imagine how much worse our fights would become then. Husbands would be shouting at us for spending his money on our selfish needs and wants. Children would be screaming at us for not teaching them islam, not monitoring them and scolding them. Even parents would be blaming us for not being the child that would have benefited them after their death.

al A'raf,7:38 - .. Every time a nation enters, it will curse its sister until, when they have all overtaken one another therein, the last of them will say about the first of them "Our Lord, these had misled us, so give them a double punishment of the Fire.

al Ahzab, 33:66-68 - The Day their faces will be turned about in the Fire, they will say, "How we wish we had obeyed Allah and obeyed the Messenger."And they will say, "Our Lord, indeed we obeyed our masters and our dignitaries, and they led us astray from the [right] way.Our Lord, give them double the punishment and curse them with a great curse."

So much for love till jannah.

Except the muslims and those granted with Allah swt's mercy and grace. Only these people would be said unto them, salamun and the gates of Heaven would open up for them to enter. And the muslim families would enter, recognising one another and relief to be together, again. This time in jannah.

May our now loving families, or our new, future loving families, continue to be the loving ones we will see and have during those eternal days to come.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014


There are things in life that sometimes are just simply tailormade for you. :") totally tailormade for you masyaa Allah, its like a dream come true! Fabi ayyi aalaai rabbikuma tukazziban.. dan beruntunglah orang yang bersyukur T_T

Be it a tailormade someone *blush*, a tailormade something *smile*, or a tailormade event.. beruntunglah orang yg bersyukur dan tetap dalam kesyukurannya.

Keuntungan itu bukanlah kerana untungnya dapat ni'mat dunia tersebut tetapi kerana untungnya akhirat hasil kesyukuran tersebut.T_T

Oftentimes we think beramal in regards to this is easy when in fact its not at all. You can just take yourself as the proof and see how many small easy peasy deeds you couldnt even consistently do to express your syukr. And you very well know that one day of syukr is not enough. Heck even a year is not enough. How can a year of syukr be enough for a dream come true? You'll need a lifetime and more. Ya Rabbi.. iyyaka na'budu wa iyyaka nasta'in..

Sunday, March 9, 2014


4 ciri ulama':

- mempunyai ilmu
- mengamalkan ilmu
- menghayati amal
- memiliki khasyyatullah (fathir : 28 - sesungguhnya hanyalah para ulama' yang memiliki khasyyah kepada Allah)

the last one is said to be the highest stage. tiada ilmu yang bermanfaat jika tidak membawa kepada perasaan takut akan Allah. and its not merely any kind of takut. because its not khauf. its khasyyah.


that being said, if amalan tak seperti yang dipertuturkan, jangan haraplah khasyyatullah T_T

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Do you feel secure?

A few months ago, the Boss was reviewing my proposal paper, when i remembered there was this one documentation i had not gotten a formal written approval for. the realisation of such a careless mistake drew blood off my face and with cold fingers and thumping chest, all i could do was pray, may she be a bit forgiving that day. Alhamdulillah.

Somehow, the nervous reactions still feel so fresh to me.Ya Allah, if only we can feel as anxious and scared every time a sin is done, every time even a smallest sin is done. If only we never feel secure from You.

67: 16 - 17
Do you feel secure that He Who is over the heavens (Allah), will not cause you to sink into the earth, when it quakes?

Or do you feel secure that He Who is over the heavens(Allah), will not send a storm of stones upon you?

7: 97- 99
What! do the people of the towns then feel secure from Our punishment coming to them by night while they are asleep?

What! do the people of the towns feel secure from Our punishment coming to them in the morning while they play?

What! do they feel secure from Allah’s plan? But none feels secure from Allah’s plan except the people who shall perish.

70: 28
Indeed, the punishment of their Lord is not that from which one is safe.

Forgive us, ya al'Afuwwun Ghafur.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Kun Sabbaqan !!

Sudah - Sudahlah ...

Duhai ikhwah akhowat
Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Dikau mengalirkan air mata tangis
Kononnya menginsafi betapa peritnya umat yang sedang tragis ..
Dikau bangkit menghilai tawa
Bersenda gurau membunuh masa ..

Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Dikau semangat membara
Menyelar ideologi hedonisma pujaan uda dan dara ..
Dikau terkinja-kinja
Menjerit melolong menyanyi berdansa bersama ..

Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Dikau terkebil menggelengkan kepala
Melihat idola siswa yang tiada wibawa ..
Dikau masih orang yang sama
Tiada usaha kurang membaca ..

Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Dikau membebel menyumpah seranah
Keadaan umat yang tak sudah berbalah ..
Dikau mendiam membisu sendirian
Tiada disapa rakan dan taulan ..

Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Dikau tunduk sesal nasuha
Pada dosa yang tiada terkira ..
Dikau ulang semula
Seolah malaikat sudah tiada nyawa ..

Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Dikau teruja memasang cita
Berangan lagak remaja Gaza, segak mengangkat senjata..
Dikau nyenyak Subuh di atas tilam baldu
Selimut nipis umpama besi berat nan beribu ..

Sudah-sudahlah ...

Hari ini
Mulut mencebik geram. hati rasa meluat
Melihat mereka yang terhegeh selalu mengelat dan terlewat ..
Dikau orang yang paling akhir
Hadir usrah tugasan pun selalu tercicir ..

Sudah-sudahlah ..
Sudah-sudahlah ...

Kita sudah suntuk masa
Mengumpul pemuda yang tinggi izzah Islamnya ..

Kita sudah suntuk masa
Menyusun tenaga menonjol idola wibawa

Kita sudah suntuk masa
Perbaiki ummah yang parah dan celaru identitinya ..

Kita sudah suntuk masa
Mempersiap jawaban tuk ketemu Tuhan Yang Esa ..

(Umatku, masihkah punya harapan?)

Kalau tidak sekarang bila lagi?
Kalau tidak kita siapa lagi?

Kun Sabbaqan!

Jalinan Ukhuwah Musim Panas ISMA UK-Eire, 

( p/s: kun sabbaqan = jadilah pelopor = be the former!)