of a girl

those pics were taken last week. i was walking home after a sleep over at a azeem's house on lygon street the night before. i actually memang intended to balik rumah around that time so i can see these kids go to school. used to see them often every morning when i was staying on lygon street last year. the small girls were so cute in their white tudungs and bags. nampak sangat tak ada masalah kehidupan. i'd been observing them from a far lagi. rasa mcm nak capture the moment dgn my camera, but i then changed my mind, later i changed my mind again and stopped to take their photo.actually i had already passed them, so i had to patah balik. talk about slow decision making.(the budak lelaki stared at me so i sort of buat2 mcm nak amik gambar the scenery belakang diorg). they were so loud, the girls, too bad i cant understand their language. the pakcik was talking to them about something, probably telling them to be careful crossing the road , which he should! the girls mcm full of stamina to run around everywhere. diorg even main acah2 nak lintas and the pakcik had to tell them off. yeah its not funny, kids.

after the third picture, i stopped snapping and continued looking at them laughing and running. then when diorg tgh nk cross from the tram track, one of the girls leading the run somehow stopped in the middle of the road to look at those behind her (i think one girl called out to her to wait and stop, i cant really tell coz as i said i didnt understand them) and a car loudly and lama2 tekan hon. it was already red light for the pedestrians. she screamed and laughed and cepat2 lari balik towards the tram track where all the others were. i could hear her being scolded by the pakcik. and memang should la. nak main main jugak, tapi situation kene sedar jugak, you're on a road, girl.

so i stopped observing them, continued walking,and stifled a laugh...
which, after a few seconds later, turned out to BE a laugh.

dont get me wrong. its not that i find it funny, her almost being killed like that. its just that i think i understand her,(if she was thinking the way i thought she was la). i think kids, being ignorant as they are, tend to challenge the dangers around them. i used to feel that way too which explains my generalisation. once, i remember trying to feel how its like to drown, so i sort of pulled ainul further into the deeper part of the river we were bathing in and erm, well, kira mcm nak try together drown la konon.=D coz at that time my dad was near,he was also in the water, so i was confident he'll manage to save us before anything bad happens, as he always do. then we both can have an interesting historical STORY to tell people, of "how we survived from drowning".. wouldnt that be coooooooooooool??! ainul wasnt too thrilled about it though, not at all in fact haha, and until now, regardless of how i tried to defend myself, she'll never budge from her accusation towards me, of wanting to kill my own sister. oh!

and i remember a point mentioned by my grandmother last summer. she asked me whether dekat australia selalu ingat mati atau tak. then my mum jawabkan, of course la ingat. and my tok said to me, i'm sure you wouldnt feel too scared of it regardless, because tok and mak masih ada. biasanya org2 muda, selagi mak dia masih hidup, selagi tu la dia akan fikir mak dia yg akan mati dulu. ni tambah2 lagi tok pun masih hidup. takkan terfikir nya la kita akan mati dulu sebelum nenek kita, kan? org2 muda mmg mcm tu.padahal risiko sama je.


so yeah, i recalled them while walking back. that young girl looked so excited after being horned at, and getting off the road alive! she didnt seem worried at all, like it was all fun and games. must have been an experience for her. and the elders (such as the pakcik and myself) thinking of how she should not have done that. thinking how careless that act was. then there's my nenek, thinking how youths dont think of death too often, and how foolish they are not to be aware of it and be prepared. kalau lah org2 yg dah mati were able to talk, imagine THEIR advice. definitely would not be "you live only once, so live life to the fullest".

there's too much ignorance in this world.